New Mom

I’m ten weeks and three days into motherhood now. Time feels slippery—sped up and slowed down. Most days, I scurry around trying to conquer laundry and chores, only to lose track of everything when Will smiles or falls asleep on my chest.

One of my biggest fears about becoming a mom was losing my sense of self. I knew my worldview would shift, but I worried “mom” would swallow my entire identity. Watching Amy Adams’ new movie Nightbitch while pregnant didn’t help—the first twenty minutes alone are enough to rattle you.

By about six weeks postpartum, I realized the shift had happened. Baby thoughts were all-consuming. Everything I read, researched, bought, or talked about was baby-related. There’s deep pride and purpose in caring for this tiny human I created—but I also found myself missing the things that used to light me up creatively.

Before, inspiration would strike and I’d act on it instantly. Now, ideas come in waves, and I often have to wait days (or weeks) until finding the energy (or time) to actually follow through. It’s a new kind of discipline—learning to hold onto ideas until I can finally make space for them.

As I’ve tiptoed back into work—time in the studio, moments of alone time, even just getting out of the house—I’ve noticed those sparks returning. Carving out small pieces of space for myself makes me more excited to dive back into the inexplicably special mundanity of caring for Will.

Motherhood has cracked me open in ways I expected, and others I didn’t. It’s overwhelming, exhausting, and messy—but also so deeply fulfilling.

And while I’m still figuring out this new rhythm of being both “me” and “mom,” here are ten things that have been sparking joy and inspiration lately:

1. French and Italian design books from the 90s that my mother in law picked up at an estate sale for me. 

2. Following our friend's home building process. Educational with a sense of humor... 

3. Elise Joseph's style board on Pinterest makes me excited to pick out clothes for myself again. I wasn't prepared for the weird body purgatory of postpartum. 

4. The fall drop from our local wine shop, Hot Vine. Owner, Adam Bernbach creates a storyline and zine for seasonal drops revolving around a curated bottle selection. It's available for preorder here. 

5. Lauren Santo Domingo's bar set up from an article last spring lives in my head rent-free. Do people still say rent-free? I think I could recreate with these glasses from Etsy? 

6. Creating a luxe nighttime routine for myself via Elemis' Pro Collagen Cleansing Balm. I massage the oil into my skin and wipe away with a steaming hot washcloth. The smell makes me feel expensive after a day of breastfeeding and diapers. 

7. These sunglasses from Teget x Retrosuperfuture. Founder Ana Kras was also pregnant this past year and I love the way she captured her journey. 

8. This tablescape in Aerin Lauder's barn using quilts as tablecloths. 

9. This tablescape from Jacquemus's collab with Veuve. 

10. The most recent J.Crew rollneck sweater campaign made me look. The perfectly cast shoot makes me want a sweater just so I can feel like I'm friends with Benny Drama, Maggie Rogers and Molly Gordon. And if you haven't watched Overcompensating yet, what are you doing?!

BONUS: the soundtrack from The Runarounds, a pretty cheesy new show on Amazon Prime, from the same writer as Outerbanks, but with music that instantly takes me back to junior high and high school.